Monday, May 25, 2015

Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess.


This is by far one of my favorite quotes to date. If you think about it, fashion is also how the world sees you. How do you want the world to see you? And I challenge you to look past the idea of materialism, because that is not what fashion and style is all about. 

For instance, if you are interviewing for a new job, you have 10 seconds (yes only 10 seconds) to make a good first impression. I always tell my clients when it comes to a job interview or an important business meeting, "go with your power suit". This is a suit (pant suit, skirt suit, etc) that exudes confidence. You feel comfortable with yourself in this suit. Maybe it's pearl grey, solid black or a midnight blue pinstripe suit. 

You might be saying, "Well the job I'm interviewing for does not require a suit or business attire." That is OK. It is always better to over dress than under dress, because if you under dress you may miss the mark entirely; and in turn, you look out of place. Altogether, the idea is that you can focus solely on the interview. Because you are not worried at all about your outfit, you can truly showcase your experience and qualifications for the job at hand. This "go to" suit commands attention and respect, and you shall receive just that.


Pretty powerful, huh? I LOVE this quote too. It's simply incredible, because we are all living each day, going through the motions and not actually experiencing life. We wake up, take the dog outside, eat breakfast, get in the carpool line (if we're lucky enough to have kiddos), go to work, take a quick lunch break, do more work at the office, maybe find time to go to the gym, come home, rush to cook dinner, participate in family activities, possibly watch a little television or read a book, brush our teeth, go to bed and do it all over again. Sheesh! --> That's a lot of "stuff" and arguably, none of it is out-of-this-world exciting.

And this is precisely why we can lose ourselves in the daily grind; we lose our identity. We are not our daily routine. We are not our profession. We are not our title (i.e. mother, wife). We are unique, beautiful individuals. There is NO ONE else like us in the entire world. We have talents that have yet to be discovered and dreams to live. There is no better time than now to start believing that we can do anything we set our minds to. It all begins with our intentions.

(Yes, this is very deep, and I will touch more on this in a future blog post. However, I do want to share one more point on this topic.) I am writing this not because I want or need attention, but because I want to HELP anyone who may be reading this who is going through a hard time. Life is not always perfect. Nothing lasts forever. We all have our struggles, our ups and downs. Here's a little  more information about one of my defining life moments: 

I personally did not truly understand or embrace who I was until two years ago. I finally slowed down and forced myself to grieve the loss of my brother. My brother, Brian, was my best friend and my only sibling. From the day I was born, my brother was dying. Yes that sounds harsh, but it is true. He had a rare, extremely debilitating nerve-based tumor disorder called Neurofibromatosis and slowly through out his life his health deteriorated. Anyone who ever met my brother said he was their hero, their inspiration. He was mine too.

A month shy of turning 24, Brian passed away while I was attending college at Texas Tech University in Lubbock, TX. I thought I should take a semester off from school to go be with my family in Houston, but we all knew that my brother would not have wanted that. He wanted me to live life, love life and not let his loss burden my heart.  

And still, when my brother died, I felt like he was stripped from me, torn from my heart. I purposely kept myself overly busy in college and in my social life so I would not have to face the fact that he was gone. Forever.  My "self talk" was always defeating. I often had to remind myself to be more gentle: "Remember Laura, we are all fighting a battle that no one knows anything about. You lost your brother for crying out loud. You are doing your best and your parents are so proud of you. Brian is not gone; he is with you in spirit." There is one quote from the book, "Letter to a Grieving Heart", that truly resonated with me in my time of loss, and I feel compelled to share that here:



One day, I hit my rock bottom. I will never forget that day or the people who were there for me (you know who you are). I knew that there was only way out - UP. At that very moment, I was able to embrace myself and truly be "me". I found great freedom and undeniable faith. Great freedom in not caring what other people thought about me. I was truly ready to live my life. Now that does not mean that I was rude, snide or careless, that means that I stayed true to myself and was not (and am not) constantly seeking approval from others. And that leads me to my last photo:


I was challenged by a fan to post a no makeup, no filter selfie picture of myself on all social media platforms. Besides false lashes (yes, I accidentally left them on from the night before), this is my face, my skin  . . . this is me. The response we both received was incredible. She and I posted our no-makeup selfies in unison. 

When I look at this photo, I see strength, compassion, love and a sparkle in my eyes. Two years ago, my eyes were sad. I was sad. That is not my truth anymore.

And even greater, when we can look past all the stigmas and pressure that society places on us to be perfect (thicker hair, no wrinkles, bigger lips, skinnier waists, a larger chest size, even bigger butts - if I must go there) and just accept ourselves, we can then discover our true beauty! We are ALL beautiful, unique and perfectly imperfect. Please don't ever forget that.

(One of my inspirations for this week's blog posts is a dear friend of mine, Jeff Roose. It's hard to put into words how loving and awe inspiring Jeff is. His humor, passion for life and ability to make you feel so loved is absolutely undeniable. Thank you Jeff for being YOU! (See you this week at Armani Cosmetics at Neiman Marcus NorthPark.)



Hope you and yours have a beautiful week. Cheers fashion lovers. :)

XOXO,

Laura 

All styling and media inquiries can be directed to: Laura@life-stylebylaura.com 

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All skinnyinheels.com blog posts are © of Laura Fedock with Life-STYLE by Laura. All rights reserved.  The content, verbiage and descriptions used in this post and any blog post cannot be copied or republished without written consent from Laura Fedock. All photo credit is given to photographers when the photo is taken by a professional photographer. Any quotes that are included in the blog posts are always credited to respective authors. Further, any quotes from books or even the mention of books by professional authors are given credit where credit is due.

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